Day 11: I Ain't Got A Worry

Here's a creative picture Anna took of our three shadows as we were walking down the street the other day.

The kids each got to spend a few hours playing with friends today--one at our house and one at another. And it being Saturday, they got some morning TV and we made it a movie night, too. And on top of that we had baked beans and stuffing with some other left overs. What a great day, except that no one besides me really liked the baked beans. Or the stuffing. And the cats had to hide out when Toby's friend came over, because things got a bit wacky. But overall, we had no worries. Hoping Theresa and friends have none either.

 

Day 10: Star Performer

Today Toby was very proud to have been awarded the Star Performer of the week, despite all of his anxieties about his performance at school which continued tonight as he fretted over an art project at risk of not being completed on time. I tried to take a light-hearted approach and compared it to yesterday's homework which worked out just fine, but he explained to me that I didn't realize "how serious of a situation" this was. I'm hoping the weekend and having his friend over to play tomorrow will loosen him up a bit. He has his toys laid out ready for a battle.

Also shown here, The Dark Crystal, which I came across on Netflix today and had a memory of when I was a kid and my parents took the family out to see the movie, Gandhi, which was released that same year, 1982. But I stubbornly refused to see it, desperately wanting to see The Dark Crystal, so my Mom went with me while my Dad and sister saw Gandhi.

I'm now on the other end of this, observing my kids with their own expectations and deep desires, which can be "very serious situations" for them.

Day 9: Six Girls Riding on Bicycles

Draw a picture to describe three girls riding on bicycles and then three more join them. Who in their right mind asks a six year old to draw six girls riding on bicycles for math homework? Who do they think he is, Dr. Seuss? Even at a quick 5 minutes apiece, this is a 30 minute assignment for a single question among many, and then try fitting this artwork into a rectangle the size of a dill pickle. Did they really have to be riding on bicycles? And ask him what 3 plus 3 is, and he's got the answer with 29 and a half minutes spared.

Day 8: How We Are

I've mentioned Toby's concerns about "the boy who comes up to him at school." This morning he woke me, climbed into my bed, and was choked up about some other recess problems that also involve kids who, in my opinion, are just interested in talking to Toby or even inviting him to play. Certain social situations trouble him, and he copes with it by trying to avoid them. I wish he would stop worrying about it and just play and have fun with his friends. I am sad to think he views recess as unpleasant and he wants the time to go by quickly.

Anna seems to be the opposite, converting strangers to friends in a flash. After school today (half-day), I took the kids to Jump Street, where they both had a great time racing around and bouncing all over everything. And after 2 hours, Anna had made three friends, and hugged them all before we left.

Introverted myself, I was always shy as a kid, too, and had many uncomfortable experiences where I found myself alone and wishing the time would pass (though I don't recall this as young as first grade). I'm hoping Toby can find a way to get through this faster and better than I did. Or maybe this is just how we are, and going through it feels unpleasant, but is part of becoming aware and comfortable with ourselves. The good news here is that other kids genuinely seem to like Toby, if only he'd see it that way!

Maurice says, "Come home soon."

Shown here, the moon tonight, as the kids wave to it and think of Mommy. We miss you, Theresa!

Day 7: Whistle While You Work

In progress. The magic is in the patterns.

While the kids are at school, I'm doing all sorts of projects and activities around the house, and running errands all over the city. Most of it is costing us a fortune--new running shoes and socks (to match my new high-performance underwear), a trip to the eye doctor for new glasses, some replacement of various critical kitchen components (pans, spatula, um...television).

The completed antenna

The proof: 4 bars on elusive Ch 12

However, one of my associated home projects cost exactly zero, and is truly amazing. We get relatively poor reception to our kitchen TV, and usually maneuver the rabbit ears into an awkward position on the island counter, such that no one can really move from sink to fridge, etc. I stumbled across a web page that describes how you can create your own HDTV antenna using aluminum foil and cardboard, and it works as good or better than an expensive one you might buy. So, I made one. And it's awesome. It looks pretty ugly, but can be easily concealed and doesn't need to be adjusted all the time. The secret, I guess, is in the exact shape and arrangement of the metal--something about log periodic, I think a physics or electrical thing. It now gets great reception and cost nothing. I happened to have a small antenna adapter and spare coaxial cable in the garage. The rest was cardboard, aluminum foil, glue, and a few nuts and bolts. 

Below, a few pics of our fantastic students heading off to school this morning.

Day 6: The Deal

Silvery and Rose passed away yesterday. It was their time, anyway. At first, I told the kids we would get some new fish. But today, I just really didn't want to buy more fish. More cleaning of the tank, more filters and food and other apparatus. So I made a deal to assist the kids in buying some other item they had been wanting, in exchange for agreement that we would not buy more fish.

Anna is contemplating Meatloaf the dog, an American Girl doll accessory. Toby has had his eye on a Fisher Price dinosaur toy. (Recall the Target episode mentioned earlier.) Details of the deal required some concessions on my part. Toby's negotiation style involves far too much emotion. Anna is more of a transactional style, withholding final agreement until the terms are fully to her liking.

I would really like to move away from anything related to stores and buying things for the kids, as it always seems to lead to problems, and is not an area in which I'm a model parent. On the other hand, I also went shopping for various other things today and spent a ridiculous amount of money. Obviously, I need to go back to work where I can just earn money and don't have time to think about how to spend it.

(Toby continues to struggle with the boy who comes up to him at school. We now know his name, and he has apologized to Toby and given assurances of being nicer. I think it's all on Toby's end now. Toby stays on the basketball court at recess, and I wish he wouldn't let his fears keep him from having fun and playing with his friends.)

Day 5: The Tooth

Sunday morning, I was reading Toby a Magic Treehouse book (another great present from Theresa). And Anna came bounding down the stairs, shouting, "My tooth came out!"

It seems only recently this, the 7th of her lost teeth, was only starting to move slightly. But she had been aggressively wiggling it, and is quite fearless now about any pain or blood associated with losing a tooth.

On the other hand, she's still afraid of the dark, bad dreams, and certain scary things. Yesterday, we saw Ice Age Continental Drift at the movie theater, and since it's nearing October, there were several previews for Halloween movies. One in particular continues to haunt her a bit. Frankenweenie is a rather creepy-looking Tim Burton film about a boy who brings back to life his dead dog. This bothered Anna, and she hopes not to find this dog in her closet.

In a distantly related turn of events, our two goldfish both died today. I may tell the story another day, but while I expected the kids to both be distraught, it did not seem to bother them. They were rather curious, and enthusiastic about the possibility of getting new fish. I never quite know what will upset them and what they will shrug their shoulders at. As long as our goldfish don't come back to life, I guess we're ok here.

Day 4: Baby needs a new pair of shoes

The other day as Anna got ready for school, I thought to myself, "I'll bet those flip flops break any day now." And that afternoon, they did. So today we went to Target to buy her some new ones. She quickly found several she liked and did eenie-meenie to make her final selection.

I told Toby he could also buy a new pair, and after browsing a bit, and getting distracted by some Angry Birds slippers, he decided he didn't care for any of the flip flops there and would wait to buy some another time. I was quite impressed with his self control, even though I saw some nice Shaun White flip flops that I had been steering him toward.

I then extracted promises from both children that they would not get the gimmes or ask to buy anything else, and after receiving this pledge, I let them browse the toy aisles while I looked at a few other things. I came back to find Toby staring at something, obviously with terrible inner conflict trying to ward off the gimmes. It was too much for him, having seen this same desirable toy in a catalog and now having the real thing within his reach, and we ended our store experience with a terrible stand-off, outrageous demands, and embarrassing behavior. And Toby didn't handle it very well, either.

We made up later, and built Legos together. We all just do our best.

Day 3: Banana Cream Pie

I'm on day 3 of getting the kids off to school in the morning, and so far so good, though I do an awful lot of looking at the clock, fretting, and hustling them about. I then raced off to squeeze in some middle-of-day work hours. I had about 7 back to back meetings, with a 5 minute break to eat a Snickers bar I had left on my desk for lunch.

Another good friend picked up the kids after school today and we had cheeseburgers at his house. And for desert, banana cream pie. We live like kings!

Day 2: The Puppy

We saw a puppy today. The kids went to a friend's house after school today, and the girl next door was toting around an incredibly cute 6 week old puppy. Even Toby gave it a few gentle strokes. A good blogger would have snapped a picture of it to post here, but I am not a good blogger, yet. I am now carrying Anna's camera around.

I took various other pictures. The lemon tree withering in the back yard because I turned off the sprinklers and forgot that this also waters the plants. Anna walking home in her bare feet because one of her flip-flops broke. The kids sitting at the table doing their homework. Anna after a bath with a towel around her head, reading Horrible Harry (tonight's gifts from Theresa went over perfectly).

Still, none of those pictures were worth posting. I just keep thinking about that cute puppy.

Side note: the boy came up to Toby again at school today. Theresa, you will know what I mean. He wanted to show Toby his tooth that had come out. Scary. Prayers were upped a notch about this.

Day 1: Mighty Bean

Theresa left a bag of gifts, one for each day for each kid. Awesome idea, no? How fun is it for them to open up something each day as a special thing to know that Mommy is thinking about them. Of course, I know Toby's inner workings, and so I attempted to set the appropriate context... "No matter what it is, you'll be thankful, right? You won't compare to what Anna has, right?" I thought this would work. But clearly Hygiene Bean (and associated plastic ramp) had other plans for a first impression. Upon opening the present, Toby processed for a few moments, then burst into tears because this particular Mighty Bean wasn't as good as the ones shown on the packaging and also not as good a bean as Anna had. His body went limp, he fell to the ground, and displayed all the other symptoms of a boy disappointed by his own high expectations for what might be found wrapped in brown paper. Emerging from his sobs were the phrases, "I want Mommy!" leading me to think it was more than the Mighty Bean toy impacting him here.

It took various parental therapies, reading a few books, commiserating a bit, trying some alternative beans from his collection to use on the ramp, and most importantly, a bowl of Honey Nut Cheerios. He eventually collected himself, finished his homework, re-evaluated the bean and decided, "It's not so bad now."

Starting

Ok, so I never do this. Blog, I mean. I don't even post things on Facebook. But for two and a half weeks, while Theresa is off to Papua New Guinea on a mission trip, I thought I might try to keep track of some things around here. I have no intended audience for this, but if nothing else it can be for you, Theresa, to see what's happening back home while you are off to the other side of the world, and also to reflect a bit on what it's like to live life temporarily as a single parent of first and second graders.

* Note:  I reserve the full right to abandon this blog, post nothing else, elect other alternatives such as watching TV or pouring a second margarita, or otherwise give up and decide that blogging is for other more ambitious souls who find reward and therapy in describing day to day life in clever snippets and pictures.